My Wellness Diary

So some of you will know that I lost my Grandad in early August, it's been tough as I find I'm dealing with emotions I didn't expect. He was the first person I've lost and at 30 years of age I count myself extremely lucky for that. I've had friends who have lost  grandparents,parents, siblings even babies and although I would totally sympathise with them and be extremely upset for them I had no idea of the loss and complete devastation that they were feeling until I experienced it myself.

You've heard people give the advice when people are going through a hard time that nothing lasts forever, but this does this is a change you can never unchange you will never see this person again hear their voice or hold their hand. This hit me so hard my grandad was a massive part of my childhood and teenage years obviously as kids came along and life got busy I didn't get to  see him as mush as I would have liked but I talked about him alot and those closest to me would have known how much he really meant to me. I miss the little things the most, the texture of the skin on his hand his laugh his singing and he knew how I loved to get a hug and a kiss from him no matter how old I got.

Since he passed I find myself suffering a bit with anxiety almost like a separation anxiety. I think it's because it's such a big change and its really made me realise what's important.

With that being said I decided to start keeping a wellness diary. I have kept diaries in the past and it was only really early this year that I stopped. Life got busy. My aim is maybe not to write in it every day but every second day and atleast twice a week.  Its about my diet its about my fitness and its about my mental well being. How am I feeling am I happy with how the week went, am I taking time for myself, am I taking enough time with hubs to reconnect as us not just mum and dad. Am I feeling healthy and well within myself. I got the ball rolling last week I commited to getting back eating right and I booked in with my g.p for a breast exam something I do once a month myself but have not had done by my gp in about 3 years. It's about being the best version of me and surely the best version of me is a happy me.

Thanks for reading my ramblings, maybe leave me a comment letting me know how you unwind and look after you.